ASTRO MAPS SESSIONS!
YOUR MINDBLOWING CHEAT SHEET TO YOUR MOST EPIC LIFE!
HERE’S THE ABC LO DOWN BABY!!!
SO … WTF IS ASTRO MAPS?!
AND WHY SHOULD YOU CARE?! 😅😅🤣
If you’re a good hearted human like me, you may wonder why life has whipped your butt, thrown you in the spin cycle and then hung you out to see if you survive. 🤪 You may be wondering if you missed the guide book, memo or unicorn fax telling you what you’re meant to be doing here and how to avoid further butt whips! 😅🤣
I aint no sleazy real estate agent but there’s one thing those puppies got right:
Location, location, location. 😅😅😅
You see, every human has a sweet spot of places where things either come together like 40,000 magical angels massaging your pinkie toes all day. 😁🌟🙌
OR there’s places where Bermuda Triangle meets Hell, meets demonic dragons blowing fire on your titties till you die. 🤪
Astro maps is your guide to doing life like a wise sexy ninja, getting pinkie angel massages and avoiding sad, burnt titties. 🤣🤣
SO HOW DOES THIS PUPPY WORK?😁
Your astrology birth chart is a cheat sheet to your soul, telling you everything your soul signed up to do here. 😅
And … your astro maps stretches your birth chart across a map of the WORLD – so you can visit places and activate anything you want!! 🌟😋🌍WHAAAAT?! THAT’S CRAY CRAY!
I know right? It’s mental! 😉
It’s so next level woo woo that it cracks your brain. But this is a science, hacked by a team of genius astrology peeps with thousands of case studies. And they discovered:
When people go to different places, their whole lives CHANGE! 😅🥳💗🙏
(#micdrop #whattheactual) 😅🤪💥
Now I’m not saying you’re a contender for Dr Jeckle & his nut job crew. But – every time you go somewhere new, you activate a different part of your soul. 😅😉😁 That’s why when you’re in one spot you’re a non-stop work dog and in another, you drip feed lattes, eat croissants and stare at crickets.🤪
I promise – you’re not crazy! Or if you are – you’re not alone!😅😅😅
You see how this works is that those big boy planets upstairs impact us whether we like it or not. They are friendly bananas guiding us to our best life. 🤪😅😅😉
And the hack is that EVERY SINGLE HUMAN including YOU, has different planets sending juju to different spots!!! So your astro maps is like a magic cheat sheet of where your rad planet crew want you to love, zen out, be a boss biatch, write that novel or just live – so you don’t have to fumble around working it out alone, like a total nob. 😁👏🦄💗🏆
BECAUSE FUMBLING AROUND IS BORING RIGHT?!!!! 🤣🤣🤪😅
So imagine if someone could tell you – you wanna heal your heart and bring in your soul love relationship? – go here!
You wanna sort out your career and stop hiding like a scaredy cat banana? Then this place is for you! Imagine if there was a way of getting this info, making up for all those lost years of butt whippin’ (of the non sexy variety)! 🏆🤪😅🙌
WELL THERE IS! AND IT’S CALLED ASTRO MAPS!
SO HOW DOES THIS WORK BOOGALOO?! 😅
It starts with your birth deets. Once you’ve creepily stalked your parents attic to find that hospital record card or harassed hospital archives for your birth time, you’re ready to go. And – if you don’t have your birth time, there’s specialist magic juju astrologers who can legit help you get it by asking you a bunch of CIA questions. 😅 Winning!
Then I pop that in the Astro Maps software and presto – it spits out secret spots for your most magical life. Like woo woo magic on roids!
WHAT – YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME?!
I swear baby, I’m not! It spits out the maps, and then, you just need a homey to do you a solid and help you understand them, so you can use them for life!🤪💥😅
Just how a sailor knows maps for seafaring. Astro map lovers like me, froth over reading Astro Maps, to give you your 101 low down on your sweet spots across the world!
IT’S ACTUALLY THAT SIMPLE!
And, you’re getting A grade quality cos this has landed me as a 2025 Women Changing the World finalist. So it’s a Globally recognised lifechanging session – ready when you are!
SO, LET’S GET JUICY BABY! 🥳
I LOOOOOVE going deep (#godeeporgohome 😉🤣) into your maps and tuning in with my 25 years experience as a professional psychic.
You tell me what life areas you wanna dig into, I do some magic research behind the scenes and over a 90 minute zoom session, presto!
Epic options of places – near or far. 😁👍
And if you’re a curious bunny but don’t want the full Kahuna burger, there’s always a fast track quickie baby! (#everyonelovesaquickie 😉😅)
In Fast track, I talk you through what I see in a one hour real time session. No Research. No Qusetions. No BS. No fluff. Just you and your epic life changing maps – ready to start nailing your life like the 100% boss you are!
YES BABY YES – THIS IS HAPPENING!
If you want the juice on: 🥳
- Where to find love 💗
- Where to live 🏠
- Where to find your zen ☮️
- Where to find community 🫂
- Where to launch your career 🌟
- Where to publish that book 📚
- Where to smash it as an artist 🎨
THEN YOU NEED ASTRO MAPS BABY! 🥳
AND I WANNA HELP YOU!😉💗🙌
This hack is changing my life (and thousands of others’ lives) into some seriously magical juju. So if you want the universe to throw you a friggen bone 😉😅👍💗, click the groovy green button & grab your Astro Maps session today!
AND FOR YOU TYPE-A (OR VIRGO) CUTIES WHO WANT EVEN MORE DEETS: 😉💗👍
Here’s what ya do!
- Click the button and grab ya session
- I email ya questions & we book a time
- We do your live Astro Maps session on Zoom baby!
So … it’s that time baby where you gotta hit that hot little green button and say YES.
YES to you. YES to your soul.
YES to your life. YES to letting the epic planets help you!!
With all my love beauty! Let’s do this!
Aaila xx 🦄💫💗